When you’ve been in this hobby long enough, you learn pretty quickly that talking about it outside of EA or your inner circle can be a mistake, well not a mistake per se but well get to that. Things get messy fast.
You’ll hear opinions, mostly from people with zero firsthand experience - often wrapped in jealousy, insecurity, or a convenient “moral high ground.”
Especially from other men who proudly declare they’d never see a provider/escort, as if that somehow makes them superior.
But there’s one comment I’ve heard more times than I can count, both in real life and online, that tops them all:
“Oh, she’s only with you for the money.”
And honestly?
That might be the dumbest comment anyone can make.
My response is always the same, even if I don’t say it out loud:
Yes. I know. That’s the point.
This is a mutually beneficial exchange - something people outside the hobby either can’t or refuse to understand.
Providers or SBs want financial support.
Clients want intimacy, connection, and sex.
Both sides are fully aware of that dynamic, and both sides agree to it. No deception. No pretending. No confusion.
What’s ironic is that the same people who criticize this arrangement often celebrate or defend relationships that are functionally identical, just dressed up differently.
That hit me today while watching some YouTube clickbait titled something like “Top 90-Day Fiancé Gold Diggers.”
Pure trash content. but it still managed to piss me off.
Because what’s actually happening on that show?
Most of those men want intimacy, companionship, and a woman who desires them.
Most of those women - often from South America or similar regions, want stability, security, and a man who can provide for them.
That’s not a scam.
That’s not manipulation.
That’s a trade-off, and a fair one.
The men on that show know it, whether they admit it or not. And so do the women.
Yet somehow, when money is openly acknowledged instead of quietly implied, suddenly everyone rushes in to clutch pearls and shout “gold digger.”
So on one side, you have men like us - honest about what we want.
On the other, you have people posturing with moral outrage, pretending their relationships are magically free from incentives, leverage, or exchange. They’re not.
The difference is that in this hobby, we don’t lie to ourselves.
You’ll hear opinions, mostly from people with zero firsthand experience - often wrapped in jealousy, insecurity, or a convenient “moral high ground.”
Especially from other men who proudly declare they’d never see a provider/escort, as if that somehow makes them superior.
But there’s one comment I’ve heard more times than I can count, both in real life and online, that tops them all:
“Oh, she’s only with you for the money.”
And honestly?
That might be the dumbest comment anyone can make.
My response is always the same, even if I don’t say it out loud:
Yes. I know. That’s the point.
This is a mutually beneficial exchange - something people outside the hobby either can’t or refuse to understand.
Providers or SBs want financial support.
Clients want intimacy, connection, and sex.
Both sides are fully aware of that dynamic, and both sides agree to it. No deception. No pretending. No confusion.
What’s ironic is that the same people who criticize this arrangement often celebrate or defend relationships that are functionally identical, just dressed up differently.
That hit me today while watching some YouTube clickbait titled something like “Top 90-Day Fiancé Gold Diggers.”
Pure trash content. but it still managed to piss me off.
Because what’s actually happening on that show?
Most of those men want intimacy, companionship, and a woman who desires them.
Most of those women - often from South America or similar regions, want stability, security, and a man who can provide for them.
That’s not a scam.
That’s not manipulation.
That’s a trade-off, and a fair one.
The men on that show know it, whether they admit it or not. And so do the women.
Yet somehow, when money is openly acknowledged instead of quietly implied, suddenly everyone rushes in to clutch pearls and shout “gold digger.”
So on one side, you have men like us - honest about what we want.
On the other, you have people posturing with moral outrage, pretending their relationships are magically free from incentives, leverage, or exchange. They’re not.
The difference is that in this hobby, we don’t lie to ourselves.
