How to do decline social invites by co workers/friends with out outting yourself you're in the "hobby" ?

[Ch3vyh0tr0d]

So need some input here from some of the big boys I keep getting invited to places or asked if say a co workers wife wants me to get "set up with one of her...

So need some input here from some of the big boys I keep getting invited to places or asked if say a co workers wife wants me to get "set up with one of her single friends"

Although I have been able to decline most of these invites as 2025 they have become persistent things like "we need to take u out to a bar to meet someone" or co workers wives/girlfriends will be occasionally picking up their husband from work or whatever or surprise their husband with lunch etc and keep pestering me almost on a weekly or bi monthly basis "I'd love to set u up with my friend Stephanie(example name) or whoever else..

I can only make so many excuses before being rude so could use some advice on how to get these invites to stop I'm obviously getting laid plenty or as much as my wallet will allow haha and I obviously don't want ny secret to come out so any advice or ideas or appreciated

Upgrade your account to unlock this section.

 

[chapstick]

Can I ask, is there a reason why you wouldn't want to meet any of them or you have met them and you are not interested in any.

Upgrade your account to unlock this section.

 

[chapstick]

Or you could just say you are working on yourself in 2025 on some eat pray love type of thing

Upgrade your account to unlock this section.

 

[Borshak]

What kind of co workers are these? Are you running around with C suites? How old are you?

Upgrade your account to unlock this section.

 

[oc.businessman.33]

Just be honest and say, "While I am absolutely flattered I really enjoy being able to see different women on the regular. I have no trouble meeting women I am just not looking for any type of commitment."

Upgrade your account to unlock this section.

 

[Ch3vyh0tr0d]

Can I ask, is there a reason why you wouldn't want to meet any of them or you have met them and you are not interested in any.

This is a fair question... beyond the few girls my co workers significant others have mentioned (about 10-15 diff names) most i have either done my homework on (via investigated their social media) or seen pictures of i am not physically attracted to(either due to being overweight I don't mean like a few pounds I'm talking almost to the point of "curvy") or being AA(I'm by no means a racist i just personally know AA girls don't "excite me down there" ya know) but beyond that I don't want to mix business and pleasure for quite a few reasons but the most important one is "I'm the boss" at end of the day all these guys get their paychecks signed by my shop's business account checks

But beyond that not sure how to decline my co workers offer to "take me out to a bar to meet someone"

Upgrade your account to unlock this section.

 

[oc.businessman.33]

This is a fair question... beyond the few girls my co workers significant others have mentioned (about 10-15 diff names) most i have either done my homework on (via investigated their social media) or seen pictures of i am not physically attracted to(either due to being overweight I don't mean like a few pounds I'm talking almost to the point of "curvy") or being AA(I'm by no means a racist i just personally know AA girls don't "excite me down there" ya know) but beyond that I don't want to mix business and pleasure for quite a few reasons but the most important one is "I'm the boss" at end of the day all these guys get their paychecks signed by my shop's business account checks

Even easier. Just respond, "I don't shit where I eat. I don't mix business with pleasure. I prefer to keep my business and personal life completely separate."

Upgrade your account to unlock this section.

 

[Ch3vyh0tr0d]

What kind of co workers are these? Are you running around with C suites? How old are you?

Im 41 these are mostly "blue collar" co workers cliff notes is ill run and own 51% stake in a "high end restoration/restomod shop"(think gas monkey garage/that Netflix show rags to riches)

Upgrade your account to unlock this section.

 

[Ch3vyh0tr0d]

Even easier. Just respond, "I don't shit where I eat. I don't mix business with pleasure. I prefer to keep my business and personal life completely separate."

Thank u amigo I figured you'd have really good input as usual

Upgrade your account to unlock this section.

 

[oc.businessman.33]

Thank u amigo I figured you'd have really good input as usual

Since you are the boss you can actually make it clear that your dating life is a boundary that will not be crossed.

Upgrade your account to unlock this section.

 

[Ch3vyh0tr0d]

Since you are the boss you can actually make it clear that your dating life is a boundary that will not be crossed.

Another valid point i just have to figure out the right wording being a nice guy I don't want my co workers to be offended and have to carefully word what I say which I'll prob do in a email so my "no mouth filter" doesn't kick in haha

Upgrade your account to unlock this section.

 

[Sexaddict]

Go for it, I don’t ever turn down a chance for sex!

Upgrade your account to unlock this section.

 

[shiru]

Tell them I have a girlfriend. Her name is Lily Lou (Tryst Agency). It worked out for @swtypy

Upgrade your account to unlock this section.

 

[bigfan47]

I wish had friends wanting to set me up on a blind date...lol

Upgrade your account to unlock this section.

 

[FishMonger]

I've never mixed my personal life and business life. If your co-workers are trying to fix you up, then you must be leading them on some how. Maybe you are being too indirect when they ask questions. When a coworker asks about my relationship status, I just say I am happily single, I never say anymore than that. I dont accept invitations to do anything outside work that isn't directly business related, therefore they would have no reason to try to fix me up with anyone. They would have no reason to involve me in any social situations. Shit even my very close friends know that I am not interested in any match making thoughts, and I do socialize with them frequently. Just have to make you intentions known.

I thought that this was going be about asking how you sneak away from co-workers during work trips to see a provider. that can be tricky. I always get a fuck room in a different hotel, so there is no way anyone would catch me in the lobby or elevator.

Upgrade your account to unlock this section.

 

[Ch3vyh0tr0d]

I've never mixed my personal life and business life. If your co-workers are trying to fix you up, then you must be leading them on some how. Maybe you are being too indirect when they ask questions. When a coworker asks about my relationship status, I just say I am happily single, I never say anymore than that. I dont accept invitations to do anything outside work that isn't directly business related, therefore they would have no reason to try to fix me up with anyone. They would have no reason to involve me in any social situations. Shit even my very close friends know that I am not interested in any match making thoughts, and I do socialize with them frequently. Just have to make you intentions known.

I thought that this was going be about asking how you sneak away from co-workers during work trips to see a provider. that can be tricky. I always get a fuck room in a different hotel, so there is no way anyone would catch me in the lobby or elevator.

I dont think I have been leading them on(at least that I can recall) i think it's more prob the wives pressuring my worker bees since I don't even have an active social media any more so they must all be wondering who i have to keep me "company" either way it just seems to happening more frequently since 2025 both my co workers asking me out for drinks and not being subtle about it "u prob could pick up a cute chick and get laid"(their words)

Yea I'm definitely gonna do that gonna have my 1 real life friend (who knows the basics that I'm in the hobby) and this is mainly for security reasons ie I'll tell him I'm meeting someone if I haven't met them b4 and hw knows if he doesn't hear from me within like 12 hours a simple "all good" then to start checking hospitals etc ... gonna have my friend who is a verbal word Smith craft a nice email for me about my dating situation being off limits... but yea the love hotel one if on a business trip is fairly obvious but definitely a good point to remind me of thanks

Upgrade your account to unlock this section.

 

[shiru]

I dont think I have been leading them on(at least that I can recall) i think it's more prob the wives pressuring my worker bees since I don't even have an active social media any more so they must all be wondering who i have to keep me "company" either way it just seems to happening more frequently since 2025 both my co workers asking me out for drinks and not being subtle about it "u prob could pick up a cute chick and get laid"(their words)

Yea I'm definitely gonna do that gonna have my 1 real life friend (who knows the basics that I'm in the hobby) and this is mainly for security reasons ie I'll tell him I'm meeting someone if I haven't met them b4 and hw knows if he doesn't hear from me within like 12 hours a simple "all good" then to start checking hospitals etc ... gonna have my friend who is a verbal word Smith craft a nice email for me about my dating situation being off limits... but yea the love hotel one if on a business trip is fairly obvious but definitely a good point to remind me of thanks

I think they have good intentions. Just be upfront so you don’t feel anymore social anxiety or use some therapy words “I’m on my healing journey”…

The other option is go FULL astrological horoscope girl on them and freak them out

They’ll either cheat on their husbands with you, think you’re gay, or won’t bother you ever again

Upgrade your account to unlock this section.

 

[Borshak]

I'd be pretty annoyed if someone did this to me. But it doesn't, which makes me now question why it doesn't. No it doesn't. Nevermind. I show zero interest in women.

Upgrade your account to unlock this section.

 

[Townbizz54]

I don’t know why you dont want be set up on a date, there’s no harm in that but I understand.
In January of 2023 I became single after giving up my career and sacrificeing my goals and desires to have kid: for a lying 2 faced spoiled brat snob who I wasn’t even that attracted to physically. But she was my person and she ruined me emotionally. I spent the last 2 years trying to rebuild what she broke. The relationship with my family, my career my physique, even my finances becuse she had crazy wealth so we lived a crazy lifestyle that we could have been smarter about at the time. But quitting jobs was all the rage post covid.

In 2024 I went on a mission of money and muscle. I am going to double my net worth from what it was in 1/29/23 by end on 2026. I am going to have a 6 pack and bench 330 before Halloween 2026. And I will own 100 rental units. And no bitch is getting in my way and slowing down that process. So I do not date. I am on the road for work 5 days 4-6 nights a week. I need to be better in the gym but thats that’s not the point. I don’t not have time for a relationship.

So obviously people ask why , and for info when I go on dates with escorts and they hear I was out at the game the night before or something
So you could either say the truth, your not interested in a relationship and enjoy being single for various reasons, or lie and get people off your back and back to work. End of they day there shit don’t really matter

my point is your a grow man, no body need to know your business. And if you want Tell them there’s a girl you’re talking to and you see how it goes. If they ask about her discribe a girl you had a crush on in grade school or the next girl your looking at seeing

I tell people theirs is a girl I see who live about an hour and half away, has her own life going with her job and we will see what the future holds. Shuts people up pretty quickly. If they ask a follow up about her job, she’s a nurse or a lawyer or something stable that she can’t hustle walk away from, your both carter driven goal focused people

Upgrade your account to unlock this section.

 

[dopornstars]

I thought with the title of this it was going to be a problem that I have. I'm on a work trip in another city and excited to see an escort not in my market and I book but then co-workers are harassing me because they're going out for drinks or dinner right when I have my session booked and I have to push back. I've avoided booking on work trips because of this.

Same with friend trips. I've even stayed an extra day places but then of course my friends are like we're also staying. Shit.

Upgrade your account to unlock this section.