Reconnecting with an ATF/SB

[Sexaddict]

I recently connected with an ATF who could also be classified as an SB. My last experience with an SB taught me a lot. Over two and a half years, I spent a little over $40,000 on her, not including AirBnB and hotel stays or flights. I wouldn’t call it a mistake, but it was definitely a wake-up call.

This time around, I’m doing things differently—flipping it 180 degrees. No more “random gifts,” and no more saying “yes” to every single request. I’ve matured emotionally since my last experience. Now, I don’t act on emotion; I act rationally.

One could say she’s not a “sugar baby” per se. She’s more of an ATF I enjoy spending time with, and I only pay for her time. If I choose to give her a birthday gift, it’s entirely my prerogative—not because I feel obligated or because I think, “Wow, now she’ll like me even more.” It’s because I want to be generous, plain and simple.

The reason I’m writing this is:

1. To hold myself accountable and stick to the rules I’ve set for myself by always referring back to this post.
2. To share with anyone else who might be struggling with an ATF or a potential SB. If you already have one, remember: it’s a fun experience and that’s it. Don’t wear your emotions on your sleeve. It’s just two adults coming together to enjoy each others company—and that’s what life is about, isn’t it?

Pay for her time, and that’s it. Anything extra—like a birthday or Christmas present—should only come from a place of generosity, not obligation. Before saying “yes” to anything, think it through. Don’t feel pressured to respond immediately. Take your time!

Lastly, I would never have had the clarity to avoid falling back into a “sugar” relationship if it weren’t for the the EA community. A huge shoutout to everyone here!