Provider References are a Problem for Some Reason

[king-sama4u2nv]

Throughout my time as a client, I've noticed that references are becoming a significant issue. At some point in this hobby, we all face the task of asking a...

Throughout my time as a client, I've noticed that references are becoming a significant issue. At some point in this hobby, we all face the task of asking a previous provider to vouch for us. This seems like a simple request, something that shouldn’t take more than five minutes. Yet, providers are increasingly reluctant to provide references, which I believe shouldn’t be such a big deal.

The power of a reference in this hobby is substantial. From my perspective, it serves three primary purposes. First, it confirms to the provider that you are who you say you are, beyond the usual screening. Second, it assures them that you’re not an unpleasant person or a potential threat. The last thing they want is to deal with a creep or someone who might harm them. Lastly, and perhaps most importantly, it indicates that you’re worth their time. These aspects make references very valuable.

What confuses me is why some providers are unwilling to give references to other providers. Even more puzzling is the notion of providers wanting to get paid to give a reference, whether to other providers or clients.

I can somewhat understand clients paying for this perk—businesses need to make money. However, it seems off when it involves other sex workers. My understanding was that sex workers, particularly providers, form a community that supports one another. Yet, when you see providers complaining about being ignored by their peers, it creates a grey area.

While I don’t delve deeply into the internal dynamics of the provider community, this issue affects our community too. When providers ignore each other’s reference requests, it makes it difficult for clients to be seen. Additionally, it seems providers might start requiring clients to contact their own references due to the challenges they face.

It's not all on the providers, though. Some clients have been known to give fake references, assuming the provider won’t verify them. When providers do check, they often find they’re talking to no one.

As a heads up, don’t be surprised if your provider asks you to contact your references yourself. It looks like that’s the direction we’re heading.

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[zm7000]

Outside of a repeat client, I wonder if it’s because providers still don’t actually “know you.” Just cause you had a a good session doesn’t equal a background check. Girls wouldn’t want to refer someone only for their friend or fellow provider to have a bad experience. It’s just a liability thing.

Another reason is most of the girls look down on clients. As soon as you walk out the door you are just some loser that pays for sex. They are not trying to help you, especially if you aren’t paying them for another session

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[HolyShitsHim]

And some references doesn’t allow agency references. Which is hard for me since literally all my references are from Agency

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[oc.businessman.33]

I have actually never had any issue in this department (knock on wood) when booking independent pornstars.
When making initial contact I advise I am willing to provide references and inform them I am a VIP client with @trystagency. The ladies often know the booking agent at Tryst and they always puts in a good word.
Now if this were a high end escort not in the porn industry I would possibly be encountering the same challenges. Scrolling through many different high end escort providers X accounts they all commonly seem to express strict screening processes that exceed those of the porn industry. Just my observation.

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[king-sama4u2nv]

Outside of a repeat client, I wonder if it’s because providers still don’t actually “know you.” Just cause you had a a good session doesn’t equal a background check. Girls wouldn’t want to refer someone only for their friend or fellow provider to have a bad experience. It’s just a liability thing.

Another reason is most of the girls look down on clients. As soon as you walk out the door you are just some loser that pays for sex. They are not trying to help you, especially if you aren’t paying them for another session

To your point @zm7000. You right, as soon as that hotel door closes behind we're just another person on the street. Although, some providers won't even see you unless you have a reference, so clients will book one provider in hopes they'll help them see another. Most likely the provider they're really trying to see.

So what I'm getting at and what I assume you're saying, is that we have to make a impression on these providers in order to have that reference for future use. That about right?

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[zm7000]

To your point @zm7000. You right, as soon as that hotel door closes behind we're just another person on the street. Although, some providers won't even see you unless you have a reference, so clients will book one provider in hopes they'll help them see another. Most likely the provider they're really trying to see.

So what I'm getting at and what I assume you're saying, is that we have to make an impression on these providers in order to have that reference for future use. That about right?

We definitely have to make a good impression that goes with out saying. I’m just trying to guess why one girl might not provide reference to another girl.

Again liability or the fact they don’t actually care to help you if you aren’t seeing them. It’s pretty wrong though if they request references but won’t give one out

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[king-sama4u2nv]

We definitely have to make a good impression that goes with out saying. I’m just trying to guess why one girl might not provide reference to another girl.

Again liability or the fact they don’t actually care to help you if you aren’t seeing them. It’s pretty wrong though if they request references but won’t give one out

That's more of a them thing, isn't? I get how someone could feel a little jealous of a provider given the situation when asking for a reference, but that's seems extremely unprofessional on their part. They're hindering the provider and most of all the client.

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[zm7000]

That's more of a them thing, isn't? I get how someone could feel a little jealous of a provider given the situation when asking for a reference, but that's seems extremely unprofessional on their part. They're hindering the provider and most of all the client.

It is a problem with them yea, but ultimately limits clients ability to see someone looking for references

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[Throwawaydecent1]

Was going to start a thread but came across this. I've seen about 40 escorts and they've all been abroad in UK and Europe. Theres an agency I use in the UK and even booked a pornstar through them. The rest are independent escorts. Would US agencies accept my UK/EU refrences? I even have a profile with adultwork (one of the sites I used to book) and I have a few reviews. I can even provide some of these independent escorts twitter page and contact. My lack of US refrences is one of the reasons why I never bothered to book in the US, but I want to get my foot in the door and book a pornstar through Tryst or PC

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[king-sama4u2nv]

Was going to start a thread but came across this. I've seen about 40 escorts and they've all been abroad in UK and Europe. Theres an agency I use in the UK and even booked a pornstar through them. The rest are independent escorts. Would US agencies accept my UK/EU refrences? I even have a profile with adultwork (one of the sites I used to book) and I have a few reviews. I can even provide some of these independent escorts twitter page and contact. My lack of US refrences is one of the reasons why I never bothered to book in the US, but I want to get my foot in the door and book a pornstar through Tryst or PC

They'll accept. Even if they can't reach them if you provide the correction verification you'll be good.

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[shion]

Throughout my time as a client, I've noticed that references are becoming a significant issue. At some point in this hobby, we all face the task of asking a previous provider to vouch for us. This seems like a simple request, something that shouldn’t take more than five minutes. Yet, providers are increasingly reluctant to provide references, which I believe shouldn’t be such a big deal.

The power of a reference in this hobby is substantial. From my perspective, it serves three primary purposes. First, it confirms to the provider that you are who you say you are, beyond the usual screening. Second, it assures them that you’re not an unpleasant person or a potential threat. The last thing they want is to deal with a creep or someone who might harm them. Lastly, and perhaps most importantly, it indicates that you’re worth their time. These aspects make references very valuable.

What confuses me is why some providers are unwilling to give references to other providers. Even more puzzling is the notion of providers wanting to get paid to give a reference, whether to other providers or clients.

I can somewhat understand clients paying for this perk—businesses need to make money. However, it seems off when it involves other sex workers. My understanding was that sex workers, particularly providers, form a community that supports one another. Yet, when you see providers complaining about being ignored by their peers, it creates a grey area.

While I don’t delve deeply into the internal dynamics of the provider community, this issue affects our community too. When providers ignore each other’s reference requests, it makes it difficult for clients to be seen. Additionally, it seems providers might start requiring clients to contact their own references due to the challenges they face.

It's not all on the providers, though. Some clients have been known to give fake references, assuming the provider won’t verify them. When providers do check, they often find they’re talking to no one.

As a heads up, don’t be surprised if your provider asks you to contact your references yourself. It looks like that’s the direction we’re heading.

Here is something that is overlooked.


A provider recently stop giving reference because a client that used as a reference was overly aggressive with a second provider.

Her experience with client was great but apparently he turned Mr. HYDE on the second provider.

Now ole girl does not provide references because of the safety issue to other providers and because it makes her look bad.

If another Provider ask for a vouch of s potential client, she just tails her experience with him.

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[king-sama4u2nv]

Here is something that is overlooked.


A provider recently stop giving reference because a client that used as a reference was overly aggressive with a second provider.

Her experience with client was great but apparently he turned Mr. HYDE on the second provider.

Now ole girl does not provide references because of the safety issue to other providers and because it makes her look bad.

If another Provider ask for a vouch of s potential client, she just tails her experience with him.

Isn't telling the experience what comes with giving a reference? I have zero idea what happens between two providers and reference sharing, but I'd assume it's more then just giving a head nod for an okay.

Something like this would have to be talked about for at least a couple minutes. It would be the best way to have general knowledge of the client before any thing is solidified. This way a problem as big as this one is avoided.

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[305tillicreampie]

Throughout my time as a client, I've noticed that references are becoming a significant issue. At some point in this hobby, we all face the task of asking a previous provider to vouch for us. This seems like a simple request, something that shouldn’t take more than five minutes. Yet, providers are increasingly reluctant to provide references, which I believe shouldn’t be such a big deal.

The power of a reference in this hobby is substantial. From my perspective, it serves three primary purposes. First, it confirms to the provider that you are who you say you are, beyond the usual screening. Second, it assures them that you’re not an unpleasant person or a potential threat. The last thing they want is to deal with a creep or someone who might harm them. Lastly, and perhaps most importantly, it indicates that you’re worth their time. These aspects make references very valuable.

What confuses me is why some providers are unwilling to give references to other providers. Even more puzzling is the notion of providers wanting to get paid to give a reference, whether to other providers or clients.

I can somewhat understand clients paying for this perk—businesses need to make money. However, it seems off when it involves other sex workers. My understanding was that sex workers, particularly providers, form a community that supports one another. Yet, when you see providers complaining about being ignored by their peers, it creates a grey area.

While I don’t delve deeply into the internal dynamics of the provider community, this issue affects our community too. When providers ignore each other’s reference requests, it makes it difficult for clients to be seen. Additionally, it seems providers might start requiring clients to contact their own references due to the challenges they face.

It's not all on the providers, though. Some clients have been known to give fake references, assuming the provider won’t verify them. When providers do check, they often find they’re talking to no one.

As a heads up, don’t be surprised if your provider asks you to contact your references yourself. It looks like that’s the direction we’re heading.

The reference system is stupid and uncomfortable for all parties. Like I'm supposed to give the contact information of someone I've booked with to someone they don't know? So they can be asked questions about someone they may have only met 1 time?

There's also the "why are you booking with another girl instead of me" aspect that many providers likely feel when you ask them to be a reference.

This is already a shady business where people are paranoid enough. I feel like using another provider as a reference just hurts your relationship with that provider.

Just take a photo of my ID, social media, or do a video call or something for verification.

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[shion]

Isn't telling the experience what comes with giving a reference? I have zero idea what happens between two providers and reference sharing, but I'd assume it's more then just giving a head nod for an okay.

Something like this would have to be talked about for at least a couple minutes. It would be the best way to have general knowledge of the client before any thing is solidified. This way a problem as big as this one is avoided.

From her, he did a complete °180 with the second provider so...

These girls have a hard enough time answering emails in a 24 hour period or at all from my experience.

I seriously doubt they're finding time to write reviews of every client they meet.

I 'm still can't figure out how These Independents make a living doing this.
Mofos either don't respond or respond late when I've already left town or don't show up at the agreed upon time. Smh

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[king-sama4u2nv]

The reference system is stupid and uncomfortable for all parties. Like I'm supposed to give the contact information of someone I've booked with to someone they don't know? So they can be asked questions about someone they may have only met 1 time?

There's also the "why are you booking with another girl instead of me" aspect that many providers likely feel when you ask them to be a reference.

This is already a shady business where people are paranoid enough. I feel like using another provider as a reference just hurts your relationship with that provider.

Just take a photo of my ID, social media, or do a video call or something for verification.

Some would think it's easier doing the verification again, me included, but depending on your relationship with your provider and the benefits that come with asking for a reference; it could help in the long run. I don't seeing being much help especially with all the things you listed. I think it comes down to the provider you pick and the maturity they have. If they aren't okay wit you seeing another provider then they're in the wrong business.

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[shion]

The reference system is stupid and uncomfortable for all parties. Like I'm supposed to give the contact information of someone I've booked with to someone they don't know? So they can be asked questions about someone they may have only met 1 time?

There's also the "why are you booking with another girl instead of me" aspect that many providers likely feel when you ask them to be a reference.

This is already a shady business where people are paranoid enough. I feel like using another provider as a reference just hurts your relationship with that provider.

Just take a photo of my ID, social media, or do a video call or something for verification.

I completely agree with you.

You would think a Phone Verification or Brief Video call would suffice along with valid ID but these women.....smh

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