Throughout my time as a client, I've noticed that references are becoming a significant issue. At some point in this hobby, we all face the task of asking a previous provider to vouch for us. This seems like a simple request, something that shouldn’t take more than five minutes. Yet, providers are increasingly reluctant to provide references, which I believe shouldn’t be such a big deal.
The power of a reference in this hobby is substantial. From my perspective, it serves three primary purposes. First, it confirms to the provider that you are who you say you are, beyond the usual screening. Second, it assures them that you’re not an unpleasant person or a potential threat. The last thing they want is to deal with a creep or someone who might harm them. Lastly, and perhaps most importantly, it indicates that you’re worth their time. These aspects make references very valuable.
What confuses me is why some providers are unwilling to give references to other providers. Even more puzzling is the notion of providers wanting to get paid to give a reference, whether to other providers or clients.
I can somewhat understand clients paying for this perk—businesses need to make money. However, it seems off when it involves other sex workers. My understanding was that sex workers, particularly providers, form a community that supports one another. Yet, when you see providers complaining about being ignored by their peers, it creates a grey area.
While I don’t delve deeply into the internal dynamics of the provider community, this issue affects our community too. When providers ignore each other’s reference requests, it makes it difficult for clients to be seen. Additionally, it seems providers might start requiring clients to contact their own references due to the challenges they face.
It's not all on the providers, though. Some clients have been known to give fake references, assuming the provider won’t verify them. When providers do check, they often find they’re talking to no one.
As a heads up, don’t be surprised if your provider asks you to contact your references yourself. It looks like that’s the direction we’re heading.
The power of a reference in this hobby is substantial. From my perspective, it serves three primary purposes. First, it confirms to the provider that you are who you say you are, beyond the usual screening. Second, it assures them that you’re not an unpleasant person or a potential threat. The last thing they want is to deal with a creep or someone who might harm them. Lastly, and perhaps most importantly, it indicates that you’re worth their time. These aspects make references very valuable.
What confuses me is why some providers are unwilling to give references to other providers. Even more puzzling is the notion of providers wanting to get paid to give a reference, whether to other providers or clients.
I can somewhat understand clients paying for this perk—businesses need to make money. However, it seems off when it involves other sex workers. My understanding was that sex workers, particularly providers, form a community that supports one another. Yet, when you see providers complaining about being ignored by their peers, it creates a grey area.
While I don’t delve deeply into the internal dynamics of the provider community, this issue affects our community too. When providers ignore each other’s reference requests, it makes it difficult for clients to be seen. Additionally, it seems providers might start requiring clients to contact their own references due to the challenges they face.
It's not all on the providers, though. Some clients have been known to give fake references, assuming the provider won’t verify them. When providers do check, they often find they’re talking to no one.
As a heads up, don’t be surprised if your provider asks you to contact your references yourself. It looks like that’s the direction we’re heading.
