I ended a year-long SB/SD arrangement earlier this year ( i guess technically last year now). Have been tempted countless times to reconnect but the big head has been successful in getting me to keep the phone down.
The sex was incredible, and she is/was a legitimately good-hearted person, but after a year into it, I just couldn't shake the feeling that continuing with the arrangement was keeping her stuck in life. In other words, the allowance was allowing her to continue a never-ending cycle of short-term survival-oriented decisions that weren't improving her life in any way, rather than thinking bigger-picture/longer-term to grow/move her life forward (she is also a single mother).
Sure, it's easy to say that that's the whole point of an SB/SD arrangement is to not get involved in things like that, and to each their own, but after spending that much time together it's impossible (at least for me) not to begin to have some feelings, and at a minimum care for their well-being (not to mention her child). I could not in good conscience continue for selfish reasons knowing that it would likely be long-term harmful to her and her child.
On a simpler level, I could feel the lines start to blur, and from my perspective it was either all-in (both mutually turn it into a real relationship, which was not in the cards), or all out (ie i needed to pull the plug and move on).
Tough one to get over, but live and learn i guess. Feel free to call me an idiot!
. Is there a SB site that would include European cities like Madrid or Rome? I’m headed there this year and I’d like to have something set up.
