I don’t feel comfortable talking with a provider outside of our date. By that I mean: I’ll text or talk while we’re setting things up, I’ll chat during the...
I don’t feel comfortable talking with a provider outside of our date. By that I mean: I’ll text or talk while we’re setting things up, I’ll chat during the meeting, and maybe we’ll talk afterward about the time we had. Other than that, I don’t see a reason to keep texting. It’s not about them it’s about keeping the relationship a transaction, even though I’d love for it to drift into that gray area. They aren’t being paid to chat, and I’m not paying them to do so. Some providers are fine with it, but most are wondering why they’re talking to you for free. That’s where one provider’s idea really resonated with me.
The idea came from New York veteran Felicity Hunt. I don’t doubt a provider as popular as Felicity gets frequent texts from clients every day. That kind of contact likely benefits her career while also helping her build the client relationships that are crucial to how she runs her business. Having a connection matters — and a simple text can be a big deal to some of them.
Her post said: “Friendly reminder that if you text your provider often, that is time they are giving you for free and those wishlists are getting a bit heavy… would be a gentlemanly thing to do to lighten the load and make a few purchases to say thanks for the frequent texting.”
Sure, that can sound a little greedy or shallow to some, but it’s not a bad idea. Whether you text a provider or they text you outside of planning a date, that interaction happens on their time, and they aren’t being compensated for it. We reap all the benefits of the connection while they get nothing in return and that’s the gap Felicity’s suggestion tries to fix.
Buying an item from a provider’s wishlist does two things. First, it shows you value their time. Providers don’t have to spend their free minutes talking to clients they could be marketing themselves or talking to paying clients instead. Buying something shows you understand the boundaries and are willing to put value behind the relationship. Second, the specific gift can show a level of consideration that surprises them. A thoughtful purchase looks good and scores you real brownie points.
I don’t see any downside to this. Whatever your take, it’s an easy way to show the kind of relationship you want with a provider and make sure both sides are getting something fair out of it.
Providers are running a business, and our attention outside of a date has a cost even if it doesn’t always look like one. Felicity’s idea reframes that gray area in a way that feels fair if you want more connection, show some appreciation. A small gesture from a wishlist might not seem like much, but it respects their time, strengthens the bond, and keeps things balanced.
The idea came from New York veteran Felicity Hunt. I don’t doubt a provider as popular as Felicity gets frequent texts from clients every day. That kind of contact likely benefits her career while also helping her build the client relationships that are crucial to how she runs her business. Having a connection matters — and a simple text can be a big deal to some of them.
Her post said: “Friendly reminder that if you text your provider often, that is time they are giving you for free and those wishlists are getting a bit heavy… would be a gentlemanly thing to do to lighten the load and make a few purchases to say thanks for the frequent texting.”
Sure, that can sound a little greedy or shallow to some, but it’s not a bad idea. Whether you text a provider or they text you outside of planning a date, that interaction happens on their time, and they aren’t being compensated for it. We reap all the benefits of the connection while they get nothing in return and that’s the gap Felicity’s suggestion tries to fix.
Buying an item from a provider’s wishlist does two things. First, it shows you value their time. Providers don’t have to spend their free minutes talking to clients they could be marketing themselves or talking to paying clients instead. Buying something shows you understand the boundaries and are willing to put value behind the relationship. Second, the specific gift can show a level of consideration that surprises them. A thoughtful purchase looks good and scores you real brownie points.
I don’t see any downside to this. Whatever your take, it’s an easy way to show the kind of relationship you want with a provider and make sure both sides are getting something fair out of it.
Providers are running a business, and our attention outside of a date has a cost even if it doesn’t always look like one. Felicity’s idea reframes that gray area in a way that feels fair if you want more connection, show some appreciation. A small gesture from a wishlist might not seem like much, but it respects their time, strengthens the bond, and keeps things balanced.
